Falling Flat from Heels

Heels are evil and not to mention fail in in all aspects of women’s rights. Elongating legs, how ridiculous. My feet are in agony. My toes actually feel broken. What the hell is wrong with women putting up with this awful pain? Why do they lie and say you get used to it? How could you ever get used to it? It must be desperation and stupidity. Flats are for feminists.

My thumbs locked up in early April. I woke up in the middle of the night wondering how I dislocated my thumbs- both of them. I had to pull them to properly align them. It was agonizing. I googled it. What the hell is trigger finger? I’m not sure, but I have it. Am I diabetic? Nope. Oh well, not all things in life make sense.

Washing and brushing my long brown hair, pulling up my dark denim jeans, putting the pockets in place, buttoning, zipping, scratching, and pulling a shirt over my head became impossible without tears. Really trigger thumbs? I must be insane. Thankfully, my husband is my superhero.

My husband and I sat in a small cold room while babies cried in rooms next to us. All became quiet. “When I heard your pain level was a ten, I thought either you were exaggerating or you had rheumatoid arthritis,” my doctor told me. Rheumatoid arthritis? My dad has that and moved to a third world tropical country.

RA Factor, CCP, rheumatologist, toes, feet, knees, hips, shoulders, elbows, wrists, hands, neck, sleepless nights, and lethargy confirmed, I have rheumatoid arthritis. So it wasn’t the heels? My friends and acquaintances did not deceive me, my body did. What we have here is a failure to communicate. I was 23 when symptoms started- that was nearly 8 years ago.

I played ball with my two golden retrievers 3 nights ago. We had a blast and were all exhausted. Oddly, my wrists, knees, and feet are in agony. It’s been two days now. What could it be?

One day my brain will comprehend this all. Right?


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