Picking Up the Pieces

It’s been awhile! Shortly after learning I would be starting a new treatment plan, I headed to my retreat, my bed, for the week. The stress of this disease has often made the symptoms more ugly. I often hear my doctor’s voice, “it is important that you not stress.” But, sometimes this disease is a lot to handle! I felt malaise and my joints were hot and angry. Thankfully, I received several awesome responses from folks expressing that a change in their treatment plan was just what they needed and suffer less as a result. Rad! I hope that will be me too! I have big plans for a life with a more tamed/cooperative immune system! My joints are eager too!

During my week down (and time away from the blog), I spent a lot of time thinking. I was diagnosed with RA and a month later I was fired from my job. Worse, my husband and I were fired at the same time, on the same day, and by the same employer. I have read about awful people, heard stories, but until this instance I could not have said that I have ever known cruel people. After this experience I struggled to understand and even read The No Asshole Rule, by Robert Sutton. Though it was a great read, I still I struggled to comprehend- How does one justify the termination of a husband and wife in this economy, who have never been reprimanded or written up, who have never done anything but work hard, pour their all into a job, and obviously love what they do? Not to mention, I was sick and would suddenly have no insurance! Obviously, it was a whirlwind of fears, tears, and a hell of a lot of additional terrible joint pain. But, don’t worry it gets really good!

I can say without any hesitation that our lives are infinitely better. My husband and I have always felt that we have a wonderful life. Therefore, it should not be surprising that getting away from abusive employers only has made things more awesome. As I try new doses/treatments, my husband goes to a positive, truly rewarding, and kind work atmosphere- the complete opposite of where we were. And we enjoy our time together more than ever.

If you had asked me a few months ago, I would have thought that being sick and at home would drive me to an insane asylum. I used to be such a super busy and social body. I thought that defined me. However, I have changed. I’ve done a new evaluation for my future based on the new me. Everyday, I am developing a plan for my new future and oh it is good! I have always wanted my own business and now I am piecing things together so that I can actually make it happen. It has brought me some of the greatest joy I have ever felt. Also, though I have stressful and painful days (sometimes weeks) I have never felt the sense of peace that I do today. I know I cannot control who people are and the decisions they make. However, I can deliberately choose my own path while staying focused on the moment, my surroundings, and making changes avoid the assholes who will try to bring me down. I know my life is rad and RA, assholes, or anything else cannot take that away.

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